Peacemaking with Preschoolers book cover

Peacemaking with Preschoolers

Supporting Children at Play to Enhance Conflict Resolution Skills and Emotional Mastery

Enrico Gnaulati (PhD), Susan North, and Heather Malley

Copyright © 2026

Buy this Book

Conflict is natural

Conflict is natural in any setting, including preschools, and shouldn’t be seen as misbehavior. Instead, conflict is an opportunity for children to build social skills through creative problem-solving with guidance from teachers. Rather than acting as arbitrators who impose solutions, teachers should mediate—helping children express their feelings and work out disagreements themselves. This teaches children valuable skills like negotiation, patience, and emotional expression. True learning in preschool centers around becoming socially capable, not just academic topics. Mediation, as part of either play-based or structured programs, is essential to fostering a social, cooperative classroom where children learn to navigate and resolve conflicts together.

This book is for you if you...

  • are troubled by the polarized communication and toxic conflict all around us and want a healthier model for our children
  • wonder whether group instruction and worksheets are a mismatch for the preschool brain
  • prioritize the complexity of social-emotional learning over drilling preschoolers to learn ABCs and 123s
  • believe in nurturing children’s natural capacity for cooperation and collaboration rather than demanding compliance
  • recognize that “power over” teaching methods can interfere with authentic learning and problem-solving
  • want children to learn the necessary social and emotional skills that set them up to thrive in a future world dominated by machine learning

From the Back Cover

Conflicts in the classroom and on the playground pose a relentless challenge for teachers of young children. But these very same conflicts provide vivid, teachable moments to help advance children’s social-emotional learning, emotional regulation, self-advocacy, and empathy for peers. Mediation is the key – and it’s something not usually taught in teacher education programs.

Peacemaking with Preschoolers helps teachers learn effective, practical techniques for mediating children’s disputes. The authors provide readers with a theoretical framework – both psychological and developmental—for understanding children’s conflicts. Then they get right to the heart of the matter with scripts of actual disputes, allowing the reader a “you are there” opportunity to witness skilled teachers dealing with conflict right in the moment.

This book is built on two pillars: children need ample time for free play, and teachers need tools for handling conflicts that naturally occur. The conflicts that are bound to happen when children play with gusto and imagination are fertile ground for social and emotional learning—not an unwelcome distraction from the preschool curriculum. In short, Peacemaking with Preschoolers presents a design for classrooms where the best of what teachers have to offer in the way of mediation brings out the best of what children can learn in the way of social and emotional mastery.

Praise for the Book

Peacemaking with Preschoolers shows parents and teachers that conflict isn’t something to fear—it’s a powerful chance for children to learn kindness, patience, and problem-solving. This wonderful book turns everyday squabbles into stepping stones for lifelong friendships and resilience.
Peter T Coleman, Professor of Psychology and Education, Teachers College, Columbia University
Peacemaking with Preschoolers reminds us of what children really need to thrive—learning environments that nurture healthy human relationships, prioritize hands-on creative play, and provide opportunities to acquire essential, life-long skills for peacefully resolving conflict. An important read for early childhood teachers, administrators, and policy makers.
Susan Linn, Ed.D., Author of The Case for Make Believe
Peacemaking with Preschoolers challenges popular myths about young children’s conflicts... It explores the over-emphasis on academic training and demonstrates the merits of play-based learning in which everyday disagreements are turned into valuable opportunities for promoting interpersonal maturity and mutual understanding. The practical guidelines contained in this volume cleverly and evocatively move us beyond Montessori, Froebel, Erikson, and Piaget to a fresh, new grasp of preschool as a developmental phase in its own right.
John M. Broughton, Associate Professor of Psychology and Education, Teachers College, Columbia University
In today’s fast-paced, screen-saturated world, children have fewer chances to engage in the kind of spontaneous, imaginative play that builds emotional resilience and social skills. Peacemaking with Preschoolers offers a powerful, practical guide to helping young children navigate conflict through play-based learning... Whether you're a parent, teacher, or caregiver, this must-read resource will transform how you support preschoolers in becoming confident, compassionate problem-solvers.